The Importance Of The Word No

Do you have the bf/gf who never say no? Are you that person? Do you wonder why your spouse runs over you? Do you feel your relationship is broken because you decided  to say yes a lot more than no? There are those people that feel uncomfortable with telling people no. There are those who also like asking people for everything and some.  How does these two people coexist? You have probably been in that relationship where you never said no, and you have come to the realization that your spouse is always asking you for something or want you to do something. This is not cool and now as a result you find yourself having a hard time saying no. You are scared to say no because the problems  it may cause.


From a past experience saying yes to everything is about the worst thing you can do in a relationship. Is it bad to say yes? no! But, the ratio can't overwhelmingly favor yes. If it does then there could be some major issues once you start to get tired of saying yes all the time because your spouse could get upset when you say no. Why yes? You have your people who feel that you should put other people needs and feelings first and as a result they are scared to say no. They may have been taught that putting your own needs before others is being selfish, and that selfishness is a negative trait. I was this person once. I wanted to say yes more then no. Why? Because I thought it would make my relationship better. One thing I can say is that I'm happy I've learned this concept early on in dating. After awhile I could start to feel the effects of saying yes too much. I started to feel used up. I felt that there was never a moment of surprise because I always said yes to everything, and realized that I wasn't doing neither one of us a favor in the long run by saying yes. I did nothing but condone the self-centered  behavior, and destroyed the relationship. I'm not sitting here telling you to say no to everything but I'm telling you that it need to be in your vocabulary when dealing with someone in a relationship.

Some relationships may work with yes all the time, but for an healthy relationship no have to be in there. Saying no not only protect your feelings but it helps your spouse recognize and take responsibility for his/her actions. If you let someone abuse you by taking advantage of you they will not stop. You will have to stop them so why let it go that far. Learn the importance of the word no. How to use it..when to use it. You may wonder why do you allow yourself to continue to say yes? Well you are scared. You may really like this person and scared of rejection and looking like you not there for them, so you have a desire to project a positive self-image. A positive self-image is Great! I'm told I try to be nice to people, and look like the nice guy. Well........Should I want to look like the bad guy?...LOL...

You may be that person that hates saying no, but you must carry it with you in your back pocket just in case you have you pop it out. No to being used and taken advantage  of. No to those who want to steal your energy and give nothing in return. No to those who complain and bring you down. No to those who love making you feel guilty. At the same  time you must learn to say no to yourself. No to feeling sorry for yourself. No for blaming others. No to wishing you were somewhere else in your life. No to being unhappy.
No to putting yourself down. If you are afraid to use the word no how will you know when you are to use the word yes. Growth is about learning to give to others, but before you can do that you must learn how to give to yourself. You must learn how to  nurture your own ego until it is strong so that you are able to give the best to yourself and others around you. Know when to say no but better then that you must know when to say yes.